Sunday, August 26, 2012

a note

here i'am back at my treasure chest where i kept some worthy memories. its been some time.. and it has gathered so much dust, i can barely see whats hidden beneath.

so whats going on in my life? what happened in the last one year or more ive been missing from my blog. i wonder too.

all i could remember was some broken hearts, tears and of course, joy and new miles in friendship.Nevertheless,
we as humans brace the happiness only at the moment and often allow the sadness lingers in our hearts. The ocean of life was never tame..

Just like what my horoscope had predicted. Work  front for the past 6 months was like battlefield. it still is now.
In the short span of 6 months, i allowed myself to shed tears for not just once,but twice at work. I wish to think it was just hormones.
Of course, i've been happy at work but there are times i wish i would be doing something else. something completely different.

on the brighter side, my social life throughout the bad times at work was a compensation. Gala nights, rock concerts, rave parties to high profile dinner. Weekends after weekends and new friends after new friends. Seems just like the perfect world after dark, but despite all these glamorous evenings of laughters, champaigne and liquors, the night had  always ended with loneliness creeping into bed with me. wonder what has gotten into me. Yet, im still enjoying the freedom of being single... and it has never been as issue for me but people around me.

They wonder, they ask, they intro. They do everything to get me into a relationship. Its funny how these people are worried for me and sometimes, it subconsciously makes its way into my head. Making me want to jump into the bandwagon too.

Too bad, I can't. I can never settle for something lesser. Can never settle for the second best.
I still believe someone out there is meant for me. Perhaps someday?

When it happens it happens without you knowing it :)

Yours faithfully,


Thursday, February 24, 2011


What brought me here today writing again was contributed by 60% of boredom, 20% of need for expression, 10% of nostalgia and another 20% of random hype. Oh its 110% already? whatever.

Its my last few days as a Management Associate before i get absorbed into the business unit with a permanent placement effective 1st March. I just felt like its about to time i express my thoughts at this critical moment of my career.

I always thought graduating from this programme will be the day i look forward to, but somehow.. i dont feel quite happy and at all excited about it.

Anticipation, sorrows, worries and doubts are getting me a little stressed up. Sorry i cant help being emotional and worry. I blame my star sign for it.

Well, Ive made my selection on working in Modern Trade (just another name for Sales) and i've gotten the department i want. So what's wrong with me? i don't know.

To be frank, my selection and interest in sales was very much based on my 4 months of experience in that department, which i wouldn't say its a very strong basis for my selection. I could be lucky for having a good superior, nice warm colleagues and good account to work with at that time. But i have to realised that i'll never be sleeping on the same bed of roses anymore.

I have no idea on the exact role i'll be taking up and who will be the person that i'll be calling boss for the days to come. Though those are things i have no control over but i thought it would be nice to be at least be informed before we join officially on out first day. Doesnt seem to be happening. 2 days to my career but still no news. The waiting is getting exhausting...

...and slowly, i'm getting bored of the guessing game and the worries have sinked. I realised I've been preparing myself for the worst subconsciously.

Just another 2 days as a Management Associate before the journey begins on the rough sea.

Whatever it is and whatever it takes. I'll sail always do.

Cause rough sea makes a skillful sailor.

Friday, January 14, 2011

Belated New Year

Two and a half month past new year and a quarter of year since i last updated.
Its been a long time and long way to where and who i am today.

Some things worth noting for the past one year;
  1. Friends come and go while true ones withstand the test of time. But some, no matter how much of time.. they'll never change.
  2. Joined the singles' club while best friend of mine left the club and got herself a special someone.
  3. Conquered 2 island and survived Outward Bound. (This itself deserve a post of its own but knowing me,it'll be forever)
  4. Realized i'm capable of many things i thought i couldn't do.
  5. Male and their egos is like Mc Value Lunch. It comes in a set.
  6. Air Asia is addictive. So is ASOS.
  7. Still wondering what triggered her major acne breakout in mid October.
  8. is still learning to deal with disappointments...
  9. ... or not to have expectations.
  10. ......................................

To be continued...

Wednesday, October 06, 2010

A year had passed

Its October again and its official that i'm no longer a freshie in this company. I survived a year in F&N.
Doesn't seem that long to me.

One of the biggest event of the year for my company, ASMC is happening tomorrow at Marriot, Putrajaya...
... and i am freaking out already cause yours truly will be performing T_T

....and my dress/costume for the dance is so hideous T__T

Cant wait for it to be over. Its been 2 months of practicing after work!
im starting to forget how it feels like to go home after 5.30pm.

Wish me luck.

One thing i didn't neglect though... was shopping.
Most recent HAPPY-BUY(s) was 2 pair of shoes!
1 for work from Aldo which i've been looking high and low for ever since the last one i bought gave up on my weight.

2nd one was just last weekend at Zara. Trust me, it was love at first try. lol.

Will update more when i get some pictures.

love ya'll

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

My new found friend 1.

This is my new found friend whom i met a few months back. Introduced by a friend.
If u know me well enough back then, you will know i dont use anything else besides a cleanser (regular cleanser you can get at local drug store or supermarkets). I dont even have any preference on brands. (Currently using Loreal because "i'm worth it") lol.
No toners, no moisturizer.. no whatever eye cream, wrinkle cream, serum, spot corrector and god knows what else is out there.
Reason was simple. I dont like the routine of cleansing, toning, moisturizing bullshit and fuss. I never liked the feeling of having something on my face after washing.

As the amount of make-up i use started to grow from mascara n compact powder to liquid foundation, eyeliner, blusher,and whatsnot.... make up remover became essential.

I started using facial cleansing wipes.
There wasnt a need for eye make up remover because for the longest time i was using the Fibre-wig mascara which is pretty neat when it comes to removal. Just a lil warm water does the magic.

Then i started trying other make up removers such as Neutrogena (cream based) which is just so-so and doesnt seem to work on waterproof mascara. Later, i switched over to a jappo brand of water based make-up remover which was pretty good. Its Mandom Cleansing Express or something which can be found in Watson ever since they started importing all the Jappo stuff. At a price below RM30/bottle, its quite good at what it does. Biggest cons is waterproof mascara is still a challenge and i find the pump being tad too deep, causing you to pump too much or too litte. Prone to wastage. Other than that, i'm quite satisfied with it and i thought i'll stick to it for some time...

Not until i'm introduced to DHC Cleansing Oil by a friend (Why do i sound like im paid to do this? I don't.) She told me she has been using in back in Korea and she couldnt find it anywhere in Malaysia because her bottle of DHC is about to finish.

When we were vacationing in Spore, she finally found it in Watson, selling at $42 ( RM97), for a bottle of 200ml. You should have seen her excitement. Like she found her long lost bf or something. She talked about how good it is for the entire day after.

Apparently, its really famous in Japan and Korea.. and its how DHC earns it brand name (tru this cleansing oil). The cleansing oil is made of all natural ingredients like pomegranate oil, olive, rosemary (is it rosemary? ) and blabllabla... U can google it for more info.

She praised about it soooo much, so i decided to try hers.

I must say, its really good in removing all excess dirts and make up.. even waterproof mascara and the after wash effect is soo good! It works both as a make up remover and cleanser. skin feels so soft and supple. best of all, its all natural ingredients.. . It makes you feel soooo good.

So i decided to get it despite the hefty price (can last you pretty long because u need just a small pump and its enough to be massaged thoroughly on your face). I got my first bottle of DHC from Korea though... so it was only about RM60 after conversion!

I think its a pretty good investment since make-up has become part of my life now. As much as i like to look nice in cosmetics, i would also like my face to be thoroughly cleansed and well taken care of when i go to bed for the remaining hours i'm make-up free.

So i guess im sticking to DHC for as long as possible. This is how its described in its official site:

Superstar. Try this amazing cleanser and you’ll see why it’s our most
popular product worldwide. Dirt, excess oil, makeup—even waterproof mascara—and
other pore-cloggers dissolve easily, leaving your face a grime-free zone that is
soft to the touch. Its unique water-soluble formula rinses completely, so you’ll
never see a greasy residue. Olive oil and vitamin E help ensure you won’t see
dryness either

Furthermore, i think Watson here is already carrying a range of DHC products.. and if iam not wrong, the Cleansing Oil is priced at RM90+. (Not much of a dif from Spore). I heard their other products are pretty good too but i havent tried em yet.. its quite pricey here.

Good news: My other friend's bf will be coming down from korea to visit her in 2 weeks time, so i've asked to help me buy 2 bottles of DHC! *yay*

So, there goes my first review on facial products i've used. You know i dont usually do it. So when i do, it definately is "something"!


Tuesday, June 29, 2010

2 dozens

yay. i turned 24 today.


i wasnt expecting myself to blog today but this seems to be the only thing i can think of right now.

i told myself to think positive today because i wanted today to turn out good or great. (I dont remember since when i started believing in the power of positive thinking but i believe it works. Even if its not much, a little still works for me).

From the moment i woke up this morning, things hasnt been at their best position. i've had better luck on any other regular day.

My usual dunkin donut for breakfast wasnt on sale at the petrol kiosks.
The usual cranky email i get from my fellow colleagues wasnt there in my inbox. It was rare that i thought something was wrong with the mail service.
My usual lunch partners arent complete.

Even the usual sunny day has just turned dark, giving way to the downpour of heavy rain.
I recalled the last time i was emo-ing blogging in the office, it was raining cats and dogs too. Is this a co-incidence or the sky has been reading my thoughts?

I have just started to think since when i started being such an emo person...
It struck me that perhaps it was because,i have subconciously allowed myself to expect certain things to turn out certain ways all the time. Expecting too much of a person, a situation, a thing.
And it is when they dont go along the line, i get dissapointed...

Anyway, its a little chilly here now. The national geographic magazine which has been keeping me company had just flipped over and closed the page i was reading through... i give up. The tiny words are making me sleepy.

It feels like i should curl up on my bed next to Jack right now.

i wanna go home and sleep the day away...

Monday, June 28, 2010

My last day being 23

It feels weird today at work.
Either its Mondays blue or the shock after a week of absence from work.
But I think that's not it. I think there's too much med in me now....
After religiously taking antibotics after each meal on every single day for the past 1 week. I feel like a plant. A plant feeding on chemical toxics.

Thank god, no more antibiotics!

The meds must have caused some flip flops in my hormones because i 've been feeling rather senstive and nostalgic. I don't know why i didn't even feel like leaving my home on weekends(which i usually do) and all i wanted to do is to lay back on my comfy bed. Or maybe iam just plain lazy. Cant decide but i'm blaming the medicines.

Sadly but true, im turning a year older tomorrow. I am having mixed feelings right now bout it.
I really really wanted it to come because i have been thinking that the past 1 year hasnt been pleasant to me and hopefully, with my birthday coming and going.. the curse would be broken or something.
On the other hand, i'm pretty sad im a year older. 24 seems like a huge sum.

So, what am i going to do for the deemed special day? i have no idea. Ppl kept asking and i kept saying i dont know. But the fact is. I really dont know.
I really cant think of anything fancy nor have the mood for anything in the world right now.
But im quite afraid if its my hormones doing the tricks? i can't tell for sure if i really NOT want anything and do anything special on my birthday (which i usually like to) or its just my hormone talking to my brain right now.

Frustration continues at work because i am friggin unproductive.
I dont know if i should be feeling pleased at this or what... but i dont like the fact that i feel like a log at work.. not having anything practical to do.

I know some ppl may think iam some crazy bitch who cant stop complaining.
But like i say. i think its my hormones and the meds.

I cant help. Even as iam typing now. i'm feeling furious at myself for contradicting myself all the time..

Goodbye 23. You'll be missed. Not.